Caliber Magazine: BS-ing Our Way to Greatness

Tuesday afternoon, I received a text from my darling editor-in-chief, Nick. I usually ignore these texts, as they usually involve me doing something I don’t really want to do-and by that, Nick, I mean I just love helping out! But that day I was feeling particularly charitable, or maybe just bored. Regardless, I read it. He asked me if I could represent Caliber at an ASUC meeting in Eshleman that evening during which they’d be discussing the re-development of lower Sproul. I wasn’t really sure what a sassy little blogger like me had to do with the re-development of lower Sproul, but I’m good at nodding my head and smiling and pretending like I’m paying attention, so I put on my best can-do attitude and replied, “Why, sure thing, Nick! Can’t imagine anything I’d rather do less!” Something to that effect.

When the meeting time rolled around, I grabbed my purse and almost walked out the door wearing my usual school uniform: yoga pants, one of my 150 American Apparel sorority shirts and Rainbows. But as I glanced at myself in the mirror, I reconsidered my outfit. There were probably going to be a good amount of students there, and I feel like those ASUC kids are always so put-together looking, so I decided not to be a complete slob for once in my life and changed into something a little nicer.

You may be wondering why these seemingly meaningless details are being included, and yes, I’m aware this is not a fashion blog, kids, and that I am no fashionista. My point is, I’m sure glad I decided to change. Because when I reached the meeting room and saw the people with whom I’d be interacting, I realized sweats would not have cut it. And I decided that, as soon as this meeting was over, I was going to kill Nick.

I had been expecting what Nick had told me to expect: a round-table discussion with other Cal students. Instead, I found myself in a room full of professional-looking adults dressed in professional-looking suits, with professional-looking graphs and charts on professional-looking easels projecting the future lower Sproul. I was one of three other students in the room.

The professional-looking adults all came swarming up, wanting to shake all of our hands. The student on my right introduced himself as Daily Cal’s editor-in-chief, and the student on my left was an ASUC senator and representative from Bare Magazine. “I’m…Caity,” I said awkwardly, shaking each of their hands.

We all sat down and as they began to talk about the purposes of this meeting, I realized with horror that I was not going to be simply nodding my head and smiling and pretending to pay attention. They were the team of developers who would be creating the new lower Sproul, and they wanted to hear from each of us. They wanted to know what the needs of our respective publications were for the new Eshleman building. I was going to have to talk-a lot. I smiled through clenched teeth, plotting the ways in which I could make Nick’s death as painful as possible.

Luckily, or unluckily, the editor-in-chief from Daily Cal went first. “As you know, our office takes up the entire 6th floor of Eshleman,” he said. Of course it did.

“And where is your office?” One of the professional-looking women asked me.

The truth is, darling readers, we usually commandeer rooms in Wheeler for our team and board meetings, and luckily a lot of our publication procedures take place online. We’re only a year old, as you all know, so we’re a ways down on the student publication totem pole. Officially, our “office” is the basement of Eshleman, which is, in a word (or two), a storage closet.

“Our office?” I replied, dying to remove my sweater, “Is the, uh, bottom floor of Eshleman.”

“The basement?” Another professional-looking woman chimed in. “Isn’t that a storage closet?”

“Yes,” I said, smiling again through clenched teeth, “it’s…cozy.”

But fear not, darling readers. I didn’t let you down, I promise. Because here at Caliber, we are constantly striving to do all we can to make a better magazine for all of you, even if that means being put on the spot completely and doing everything in our power not to make complete asses of ourselves. Granted, we often do make asses of ourselves, but we do our best.

So as the editor-in-chief of Daily Cal, who had known beforehand exactly what this meeting was going to entail (cough-thanksalotnick-cough), detailed their needs for a future Eshleman, complete with handouts for everyone of their entire-6th-floor plan, I began texting Nick furiously.

“And what’s your weekly circulation?” one professional-looking developer would ask the E-I-C.

“Quick, what’s Caliber’s weekly circulation?” I’d text Nick.

“These are our needs for the new Eshleman building,” the E-I-C would say.

“What are our needs for the new Eshleman building?” I’d text Nick.

After a few minutes of this, I decided Nick could live. He texted me back almost instantaneously with all the information we needed. And I have to say, once I had a better idea as to what the hell was going on, this sassy little blogger made for a pretty good saleswoman, if I do say so myself. Once Caliber’s turn came along, I started listing off all the things Nick told me to say, and told them exactly what a sweet publication like Caliber was going to need in the new Eshleman. Conference rooms, storage for our magazines and racks, a computer lab…they nodded vigorously as I listed these things, as if they were a given, as if they were necessities. They were like the fairy godparents of student publications. They even suggested other accommodations that hadn’t even occured to me. This all sounded a helluva lot better than the basement of Eshleman, so I smiled and nodded, something I’m good at.

All in all, the professional-looking developers, the E-I-C, and the ASUC senator engaged in what I thought was a great conversation in which the adults actually listened to what we had to say. As if they valued student publications and wanted to do everything in their power to accommodate us. They listened to our requests and suggestions and offered new, exciting ideas for the huge variety of newspapers, magazines, and literary journals on campus. They’re planning on meeting with us monthly for the first semester until they begin construction, and I left that meeting completely and totally stoked about the future, not just for that of lower Sproul but for the future of Caliber.

And so my darling readers, there is a moral to this way-too-long article. And that moral is that there’s some pretty awesome stuff floating on the horizon for Caliber, and that y’all should stay tuned, if you want to be part of something great. That, and Nick and I are pretty good bull-shitters.