For the past week or so, I’ve had to pace quickly and keep my eyes down as I walk past Sproul Plaza and onto Telegraph. No, not because I want to avoid the sight of the “porky” homeless man who naps on the bench exposing his rather large belly, but rather because I have been trying to avoid making eye contact with the cute little Girl Scouts standing there. I know that if I even so much as glance at them, I will end up with five boxes of Thin Mints and with an extra 15 to my freshman 15. Oh yes. It’s that time again. It’s Girl Scout Cookie season.
Girl Scout Cookies are an American tradition. They have been on the market since 1917 as a means to fund the Girl Scouts’ activities. The purpose is to teach the girls goal setting, decision making, money management, people skills, and business ethics. But let’s be honest, like most everything else in our capitalist society, money is the end goal. Each season the Girl Scouts sell almost 200 million packages of cookies and they bring in about $700 million in revenue! This is a bunch of middle schoolers we’re talking about. Bringing in 700 million dollars. Cut us a piece of that cookie why don’t you.
You may have heard recently that a very business savvy Girl Scout, with the permission of her parents and the backing of the Girl Scouts of Northern California, set up her cookie stand in front of a medical marijuana dispensary in San Francisco (we’d only be less surprised if it was in Berkeley). She sold 117 boxes in just two hours. My question is how a thirteen year old knows about munchies but that’s a different story. Clearly the modern day Girl Scouts are on their A-game. They even have an app. That’s right. You can conveniently whip out your phone and track your nearest Girl Scouts’ stand if you urgently need some cookies. It’s kind of creepy if you ask me, but hey, when you need a cookie, you NEED a cookie.
We look forward to it as soon as it’s over every year, but when it arrives, we curse our inability to resist. We know we should really resist the temptation, especially with bikini season coming up, but gosh darn it, we need to support our Girl Scouts! In case you’re only familiar with the top selling and reigning Thin Mints and Samoas, take a look and meet the rest of the beauties.
Thin Mints® 
Samoas®/Caramel deLites® 
Peanut Butter Patties®/ Tagalongs®
Trefoils® / Shortbread 
Do-si-dos®/ Peanut Butter Sandwich 
Lemonades™
Savannah Smiles® 
Thanks-A-Lot® 
Dulce de Leche
Cranberry Citrus Crisps 
Chocolate Chip Shortbread
Thank U Berry Munch™
Just in case your anxiety is building and a depression is in sights for the nearing end of Girl Scout cookie season, let me suggest you put a couple (or dozen) boxes in your freezer to get you through the year. And, if you found yourself with a powerful craving for some Thin Mints in the past three minutes, there is a local Girl Scout troop stationed near Sproul Plaza just before the crosswalk and also in front of Cafe Strada. You’re welcome.
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