Bachelor Episode Review: “Skinny Winning”

If this week’s Bachelor could be described in one phrase it would be “skinny winning.”  Chances are Courtney offended you at one time this season and in this episode especially.  But while this token model may have packed lightly in the morals compartment for Puerto Rico, a true Bachelorist knows that our communal disgust and fascination with Courtney shows one thing: she runs this show.  If the girls’ escape to a place where they can finally wear bikinis proved anything this week it’s that this season is Courtney’s season (well until she gets cut).

photo courtesy of USAToday

Though she didn’t get the first rose (Ben was probably trying to make the other girls feel better), Courtney took her bitchdom to new lows this episode and our attention span thanks her for it.  While the other girls tried to get to first base with Ben during the softball competition, Courtney gave us commentary worthy of the box seats when she wonders “Who knew strippers could play baseball?” in regards to Blakely, the VIP cocktail waitress (clearly her reasoning isn’t too far off).  Courtney’s jealousy towards 24 year old Kacie also showed us a more vulnerable side as she laments “Kacie doesn’t have a lot of world experience.”  I think we all sympathized for the lack of appreciation Ben is giving Courtney’s four years of worldly knowledge over Kacie.

An hour and half in has the girls passing final judgment on Courtney so it’s no wonder our favorite model feels the need to cleanse herself of evil—without clothes but with Ben.  Any feminist can appreciate her “A girl’s gotta do” mantra though Betty Friedan probably would have preferred a bit of decency to couple that assertiveness.  Like a true “betch” (or raging narcissist) Courtney flaunts her skinny dipping accomplishment in front of her competitors according to the strictest rules of girl-world and almost gets Emily sent home, the girl with a PhD who can’t see how throwing Courtney under the bus makes her look insecure.  Whether it repulsed us or not, Courtney can change her fave line from “I got a rose—winning” to “I got Ben naked in the Caribbean—winning.”  Ben’s Neanderthal looks may have bored us this season but Courtney’s games finally are picking up.  Should we feel ashamed for somewhat admiring this Machiavellian model?  Nah, to quote the skinny winner herself,  “Let’s be honest, I don’t feel that bad.”